Attention to All Choral Music Lovers> > >Types of Choristers and Steps to Handle Their Excesses.

HANDLING THE TOXIC CHORISTER. 1.The 'spiricoco' choristers. Don't allow them to manipulate you. Sometimes they come with some 'prophecies that are so shocking and scary that may want you to suspend the rehearsals for a month of praying and fasting'. Take some time to weigh them prayerfully before bowing to their wishes. Have a spiritual program for the choir too. (prayer meetings, vigils, and choir retreats). Be also up in the spiritual game. If they realize your own spiritual thermometer is strong, they will not come snuffing some 'horrible prophecies' down your throat. Frankly, choir business is a serious spiritual business. So, let's also approach it once in a while 'spiritually'. 2. The 'Tatafo' chorister. Rumour mongers thrive in places that are clandestine in nature. When your plans and programs are shrouded in secrecy, then the tale bearers hold sway. Make sure the choir is adequately and sufficiently carried along on any issue, no matter how minute. Don't pat the 'Radio Kudirat' at the back. Anytime such a one is discovered, he or she should be reprimanded. If he fails to stop, then he can be suspended from the group. Develop a feedback mechanism where members can easily approach you on matters 'trending' without being witch hunted. 3.The 'Never grow old' choristers. Promote them out of relevance. You can make them 'honorary members'. Create an age group choir where they can function. Make the choir so formidable that they have no alternative than to either conform or leave. However, if they are making your stay a 'hellish' one, you need higher hands to look into the matter before they turn you into their 'napkin'. 4. The 'Money speaks' chorister. Develop other 'fundraising mechanism aside just one person in the choir. No reasonable choirmaster should take up a choir that the church leadership is not ready to fund. You end up becoming a beggar and a nuisance before people. There are facilities that the choir needs. Sometimes they do not know. That is why you are there to tell them. Do not bend the rules for the 'money speaks' chorister. The choir is not all about doling out money. If you are also an 'egunje' choirmaster, put a stop to it else you sell your authority or prestige for a plate of 'porridge from these 'moneybags! 5. The 'touch not my talented' chorister. Create avenues for training others. Don't use only one person when you have other talents. Give equal opportunities to others. Let the 'superstars' know that the role they are occupying is a privilege and not a birthright. Desist from treating them specially from others lest they become 'thin gods'. By that you will be cancelling the 'if am not there nothing will happen' theory. 6. The 'Omo Alufa' choristers. First of all, you must note that what is 'good for the goose is good for the gander'. They may be children of the leaders but that doesn't mean you bend the rules because of that. Sometimes you are afraid that this may boomerang on you. But that is a small fry when compared to the respect you would lose from your members for being so partial and 'double faced'. They may not say it to your face. But it ends up at several 'hush' talk shops in the choir. Your reputation and leadership style is compromised. They may fight it so difficult to trust you again. 7. The 'aluta' chorister. There are 'aluta choristers that are just doing it to be noticed. (I call them the 'one man Mopol') Where there is no smoke you hear them shouting 'fire, fire! But there are others that are really doing this because they feel this is the only language you understand. How do you deal with these people? Especially when what they are fighting for is legitimate?. It is better you also consider your leadership style and personality. Sometimes, the 'sleeping dog' in some people are aroused by the choirmaster's actions or inaction. When a member is the choir suddenly becomes a 'whistle blower' for the right reason, it is better to look inwards and ask yourself what you have been doing wrongly. If everyone in the choir hates you to send an aluta man after you, then you must be that bad!! Create a feedback mechanism from your members. Seek for their opinions in some issues and don't form the habit of snuffing your personal decisions down their throats weather they like it or not. You may be shocked that your members are not as dumb as you thought. This will further cripple the 'aluta One man mopol'. He suddenly looks back and finds no one following him (like the proverbial yoruba adage: won o fe e ni 'lu o nda'rin... Talo ma ba e gbe?) Translation: they don't want you in the community and suddenly you take up a solo, who will join you to sing along? 8. The 'Kindergatten' choristers. These ones just need attention. Sometimes they do it for fun. At other times, they just want to frustrate you. One way to do this is to adopt a no nonsense approach. Just break their ranks. It takes two talkative to maintain a ceaseless charter. Discover the human 'virus' and distalize them. Make sure they do not sit together for a long time. At other times you adopt this painless approach.'Pocket your lips' This is what I call "planned ignoring'. There are some choristers who delight in you calling their names at all times. At least they are known for something in the choir. The only way you may discourage such is by looking the other way. If on these do not work, then you may have to read the riot act. ' I do not appreciate the way you (mention their names) are causing distractions in this choir. If you are not very convinient with this, then I want you to please take your belongings and leave the choir right now.' That, I believe will bring them back to their senses. 9. The 'too know' Study these 'too know' people very well. If you realize they have what you do not have in terms of intellectual capacity, then strategically utilize them. There are times a choirmaster becomes one out of necessity. He may not have the musical background but has been able to keep the choir going for his ability to utilize the gifted hands in the choir for good. But if you find any chorister incorrigible because of his level of training, it is best the person is relieved from the choir. Don't forget, a real choir member must be FAT. F - faithful A- available T- Teachable 10. The 'PHD' chorister. These people should not be allowed an inch of space in your choir. They are the 'termites' that will destroy everything you have labored for. The only alternative is to identify them and show them the way out! 11. The 'panda' (counterfeit) chorister. It is no fault of theirs. They do not have the singing voice and there is little we can do about it. The major step to success is to identity them. If they are young children, then there is still some glimmer of hope. Work out some training programs for them ( which I doubt may not work for some). You can also give them other jobs to do in the choir order than singing. If they can play on the instruments or any administrative works, fine. There are some you just have to tell the hard truth that the choir may not work for them. Its best they do not continue to leave in fool's paradise. 12. The 'Mungo Park' choristers. Stop the 'canteen choir' mentality. The choir business demands a lot of time. It is only the people that have the time that can profit thereby. Regular attendance is key. It gives you the opportunity for you to bond as a group. If we find people who are constantly of the choir radar and you still allow them to sing, you are setting the tone for an eventual collapse. Singing is not about the numbers but the finesse in presentation and performance. I'd rather a choir of 12 people that are very consistent and available than a bunch of 'Mungo Park' singers that remember the 'choir canteen' only when they are hungry. 13. The 'paddy paddy' choristers. Initiate a 'business before pleasure' policy. Let your close associates understand that when you are in the choir, you put of the garbs of 'intimacy'. You are now their choirmaster hence, the need to obey all rules. This should also show in your disposition towards them in the choir (though I do not subscribe to being too tough on them. That could also give you a bad name). They should be ready to follow all the choir tenets without being cohearsed to do it. 14. The 'boot-licking' chorister. As much as possible, limit the 'sycophancy syndrome' amongst the choir members. Some people like singing your praises. But you must know when those 'praises are made for other reasons. If a member comes telling you only what you want to hear, he is a sycophant. If they do not see any wrong in what you are doing (when it is obvious that you have goofed, and you know it) he is a sycophant. When he is applying the 'divide and rule' method on the leadership, manipulating you all to the picture that best suits him, he is a sycophant. When it is always 'sir, do not tell them I came to tell you. I am doing this for the love of the choir', he is a sycophant. Make him continuously less relevant in the scheme of things by using the 'planned ignoring method'. And most importantly, don't believe everything you hear from a boot licker. He may just be telling you tales from the reverse! 15.The 'BBC' Choristers. Every church or organization has a musical heritage. The task of the choirmaster is to key into the heritage and improve on it, not destroy it completely. There are two styles in any worship: the essentials and the variables. The essentials are the constant practice of the church (hymn singing, praise worship, chants etc). These ones are already set by the organisation. The variables are the special ministrations from the choir. This is where you adopt the 'total art approach'. Make your church happy by satisfying the music taste of everyone. Remember they are from various backgrounds. If you feed them with one style every time, the BBC choristers will kick and grumble. Hence, once in a while, give them what they want. Sing some of the soulful tunes and arrange them to meet the present realities. Even if it will take you to sing it the way of yore, please do it once in a while. Let there be a synergy between the old and the new, and don't give the old folks the impression that they are no longer relevant in the choir scheme.